"The Worst Thing you Can Do Is Nothing..."

The chill seems to have returned again this campervan morning. A thick slab of grey cloud overhead, a breeze with a sharp edge to it when it blows. Blackbird singing in the very top of the ash, once more being replied to in the distance. A couple of starlings flit between the oak and the ash, gathering briefly to drink at the small nook half way up the oak before dashing away again. An array of sparrows, robins and a couple of blue tits flit around hedge, grass and bush. A great tit sits on an outer branch, it’s two time call cutting through everything. There is a buzz of traffic in the distance to accompany the mornings natural opening. The coffee is welcome, it feels still a bit too chilly to be April and heading towards May. Early unexpected busyness yesterday, disrupted the campervan routine and the inability to post sat with me for most of the day. The desire for, or perhaps the safety net of structure, plan and routine tested. A sense of personal responsibility to carry this out every morning. However it’s a delight to grab a few moments once more this morning, to be and reflect on a few thoughts. Not a huge amount to report, the final touches to travel in a few weeks, so a sense of anticipation around that. Also a decision weighs on me a little, the fear of letting people down, the inability to make it sits with me and has done for the last week or so, almost a sword of Damocles sitting over me. The shifts and changes in life, where priorities move, directions change and what was once important is no longer so. Coming to terms with some of this over the last few days and exploring why it’s been so difficult to make. There is part of me that needs to make a choice based on facts not in the fear of being judged, fear of letting people down. There is another part of me uncomfortable with having certain elements of my fate or life in the hands of others. So it comes down to courage and choice and they both sit squarely with me. All feels a bit serious this morning, but that’s the swings and roundabouts of being. Lovely days people.

“ In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.” Theodore Roosevelt.