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“And I do love myself, as quietly as I can“.

Rain on the air and heavy cloud overhead once more this campervan morning. I think if I could use a word to describe the weather so far this year it would be grey. The light is heavy and grey and a fair reflection of my surroundings, though it’s a good deal warmer than yesterdays start. The additional benefit of this weather combination and breeze is that it appears to have silenced the usual omnipresent grind of far off commuters, so the soundscape is awash with birdsong. My current companions the starlings are in the Oak above me this morning, rather than the nearby Ash. High up gulls swirl on the air, geese passing over once more, a lone magpie on a nearby roof with his usual staccato cry. I am waiting for the arrival of the robins on their morning forage. The sound of wind blowing through tree, bush and hedge. Surrounded by dampness and the residue of overnight rain and the threat of more to come hangs in the air. An interesting drumming session last night, more of which I will share another time. I have been reflecting this morning on something one of my closest friends sent me. It was a short TikTok video. I don’t do TikTok and rely on this friend to keep me abreast of the things of beauty that occur there. This video was one of those. A gorgeous young man over the period of a minute or so gently listed the things that he loved and those that were special to him. It was such a powerful testament to seeing the love in what people may see as the ordinary, maybe even for some the mundane, or those we take for granted and also those things that are special. It has had me reflecting on what I love and being perhaps more alive to the experience of the so called mundane and the ordinary. The scientist and author Richard Dawkins in his book ‘The God Delusion ‘ writes :


“The word ‘mundane’ has come to mean ‘boring’ and ‘dull’, and it really shouldn’t – it should mean the opposite. Because it comes from the latin mundus, meaning ‘the world’. And the world is anything but dull: The world is wonderful. There’s real poetry in the real world.”


So I have been reflecting on a list of the apparent ordinary, mundane and special things that I love. Connecting more and seeing more deeply the beauty in all of them. This young man closes his list with the following words :


“ And I do love myself, as quietly as I can “.


So this campervan morning I am thinking deeply about the things that I love.


I love people, meeting people, talking to people and sharing their stories. I love the duality of that and the silence and isolation that nature brings me. I love the routine of sharing my thoughts. I love hugs, I do really love hugs ( I don’t think I got enough of them as a child ), I love being in the presence of silence, but I love the sound of voice and music. I love the smell of my first coffee in the morning. I love people sharing themselves with me and likewise my sharing of myself. I love human touch, hands and warmth. I love the thrill of new places, new sights and sounds, but I also love the comfort of the familiar. I love the sound of running water, stream, river, lake or sea. I love the warmth of sunshine and the ice cold of winter or the wet of rain.


I am also trying to love myself the best I can. Lovely days people.


“ My eyes saw you, but damn, did my soul feel you.” Melody Lee.



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